i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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