You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize