You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Dick very happy bro
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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