It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
