I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
His nipple licking is glorious
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