Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
