Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
