Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
