TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
