Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
