at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Randomize
