Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
