Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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