I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Randomize