That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
