She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
