he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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