I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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