I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
