At least make sure they are 18
Why
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
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