I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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