Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
