He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
Hurry there's a dancing lesbian. She's a jumper and has impeccable jazz hands.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
