I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I would fuck him just for his dog
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Randomize
