You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Randomize
