Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Randomize
