Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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