So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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