remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
no. you can't hotbox the world.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
I think your dad took our porno
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize