she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
