Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Just saw a 300lb woman fall down. Shes screaming like a beached manatee. Her 120lb boyfriend is trying to push her up. It's like watching an infant try to bench
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
