this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
Randomize
