dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
it hurts more in the daytime
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
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