i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Randomize
