im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
