How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
