she woke up with a sticky ear
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
