So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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