dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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