I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I wish i was in the wii world.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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