she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Four minutes until I can fart!
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Randomize