is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize