In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize