so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Randomize
