im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
