I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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