I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
