Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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