Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
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