Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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