doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
